Wildfire
the feeling to create. to make something out of nothing. it's made a return. so here i am again, creating. vulnerability flowing through my fingertips and onto this screen.
fear called my name last night. i didn't answer. the feeling of helplessness pulsed through my veins. as i felt the howling screams trace their way up my spine, i surrendered. i let go. i fell into a distant memory left untouched for years. a memory from my childhood. the first time i had ever felt that same feeling of helplessness. and then i realized something. i am okay. no physical possession can penetrate my walls. for i have a raging fire that tears through my veins. disintegrating anything that attempts to pry its way in. lungs of steel that breathe indigo flames. i am learning to walk the thin line of uncertainty laced with carelessness. this experience has taught me this. the veil between illusion and truth is thinning. do not bury your fears any longer. do not run from them. become lighter. do not let the selfish acts of others tame your fire. rise from their ashes. unfold your wings. the past 24 hours have been nothing short of surreal. i have been brought to my knees. engulfed in a depth of gratitude which cannot be touched by any string of words i put together. i can only attempt to scratch the surface with what i write, chills tracing their way across my skin. i have created a home within my mind. a sacred space that i find myself collapsing into when my limbs cannot carry me any longer. i can feel myself expanding. stretching inwards. finding refuge in lost souls. i have seen fear carved into my edges but this experience has reminded me what it is to be alive. perhaps i needed to be pulled into these depths so i could rise again. i have learned to light the fire with the breath pouring from my lips. i nearly drowned in the tears of others. but alas, a still spark remained.. and with it i'm going to breathe life into a wildfire.
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